The area of sex relationship advice is one where there are many aspects to cover. Perhaps a good place to start would be to say it is a good idea, when getting involved in a relationship, not to rush into the sexual side of things.
Very often what happens is that men want to get involved sexually as soon as possible.
This can have such a negative effect on women as they can feel they are being treated as sexual objects, and there is no real interest in them as a person.
This can lead to relationship trust issues, thinking that is all men are interested in.
I was speaking with a woman recently who said she found it impossible to have a friendship with a male because of the sexual tension she experienced. It seems a lot of men do not know how to have platonic relationships with women. She regretted this and would like to have male friends. She is in her late fifties.
Some women can think they are being acknowledged when they agree to sex, and this can become a pattern.
They don’t recognize the sex relationship advice that what is happening is that they are being used.
If they do, they pretend not to, but it has a big effect on their self esteem. They can seem hearty and cheerful, but underneath, they don’t feel good about themselves.
As far as this sexual activity is concerned, I can think of several women who are in this grouping.
One is renowned among her friends for repeating this pattern. She is a lovely person but continues on this path. It seems it could be useful for her to get some professional sex relationship advice.
I recall a woman I saw as a client who was very much in this pattern, and she came to see me as she wanted to deal with it.
I was so amused, when, during the first session we had, she made some very obvious advances. I guess she was so used to behaving this way, and wasn’t even aware she was doing this with me.
I expressed my amusement to her, and we got on with our sex relationship advice session without any more advances from her!
When it comes to sex in a relationship, it is often only the man’s needs that are taken into account.
This can be for various reasons, such as, the man is only interested in meeting his needs and doesn’t think or care about the woman’s needs.
Or it can be thought that the man’s sexual requirements are greater and need to be met, and that women don’t have the same need. This can be the extent of the sex relationship advice that some people get.
Many believe womens’ sexual needs are taken care of through intercourse. This is the ‘hollywood style’ of sex we see portrayed so often.
Some women think they are meant to be satisfied sexually this way by having orgasms in intercourse. When they don’t, they can believe there is something wrong with them.
There are several points in relation to the sex relationship advice that can be made here.
Firstly, it is important to emphasize there is no difference in the sexual needs of men and women. Our needs are the same, contrary to the view that is constantly being put forward. This is one of the new relationship questions that needs to be answered at the early stages of any relationship.
That reminds me of these two older people who met and fell in love. They were talking about how things were going to be in their relationship and the man said to the woman “what about sex between us?” and her response was “infrequently,” and he said, “is that one word or two?!”
Secondly, a crucial point to make with regard to sex relationship advice, is, that women require stimulation of the clitoris to achieve orgasm. A lot of men do not know this and think women are meant to achieve orgasm in intercourse.
Some women do not know this themselves. During the time I worked in a sexual difficulties clinic, the most common issue being dealt with was women not having orgasms.
A survey of this group indicated all of them had sought help from other professionals such as doctors, psychiatrists or other therapists previously, without getting the help they required.
The most important sex relationship advice I can leave you with is to emphasize there is no difference in the sexual needs of men and women. The supposed differences that are commonly accepted is a result of the conditioning process we have all experienced. I expect for some of you that is going to be surprising information.